Equipping Parents to Establish Gospel-Centred Homes
By supporting and equipping parents, you can prepare them to share the gospel with their children
Whether you’re a parent or church leader (or both!) you don’t need to be too old to feel overwhelmed by the challenges facing parents today. More pressure to attend activities, the ever-present opportunities and pitfalls of technology, the list goes on. Amidst all these changes, one thing that remains consistent is the challenge parents face when it comes to impacting their kids with the gospel.
The Barna Group in America did some research in 2003 which revealed that 85 percent of parents with kids under the age of 13 believe they have the primary responsibility for teaching their kids about religious beliefs and spiritual matters (only 11 percent said it was the church’s primary responsibility). The most striking part of the research was the finding that “parents are not so much unwilling to provide more substantive training to their children as they are ill-equipped to do such work.”
In my experience in America, Costa Rica and here in Australia, this finding still rings true in many of our churches. Parents feel a sense of responsibility but do not have the tools they need (and want) to impact the next generation with the gospel. Considering all the time pressures facing children and family ministers today, this seems to be an amazing opportunity to equip parents and kids to partner with us to advance the cause of the gospel in our homes, churches, and communities.
Many of our churches invest in premarital counseling for young engaged couples. We do that because marriage is a relationship – and a calling – that the Bible has a lot to say about. And it’s a uniquely stressful and important transition. Sounds a lot like becoming a parent, doesn’t it? A relationship and a calling that the Bible has a lot to say about. And it’s certainly a uniquely stressful and important transition.
So how can we equip parents to succeed in their calling to prepare the next generation to treasure the gospel?
Let me suggest three steps:
Encourage parents to start early
Related
What does partnering effectively with parents look like?
By finding ways to partner with parents through children’s ministry you can work together to disciple young Christians.
It’s helpful to think about the spiritual development of our kids similarly to how we think about it in other areas. We expect good table manners from our kids when they grow up but we don’t stop feeding them just because a baby smashes a banana in the carpet! Even the best athletes need help from mum and dad to learn how to walk. Even the highest achieving students need help to learn their letters as they start to read. We shepherd our kids’ development, looking to age-appropriate milestones and development. And we invest more time in the goals that are more important to us and for them. As we talk with parents in our church we should be encouraging them to start the journey of discipling their kids early.
Encourage parents to start small
When we tell many parents to “start early” it can be very overwhelming! So it’s also important to make sure parents know it’s ok – and completely appropriate – to start small. We believe that the Bible is breathed out by God and useful to equip God’s people (2 Timothy 3:16), so we commit ourselves to age-appropriate development in treasuring God’s Word. When our children are very little, parents can read short passages of the Bible with their kids and recite verses to crying babies and small toddlers. As they grow, parents and kids can memorise verses together. Young readers can be encouraged to start the journey of regular time reading God’s Word alone. This is a habit we can foster and support much like we do with sports practice or music practice!
Likewise, parents who commit themselves to “pray without ceasing” (1 Thessalonians 5:17) can start modeling prayerfulness from the very first moments of a baby’s life. We build the foundation for the great joy of shepherding our child’s prayer life when we start with short prayers at bedtime, meal times, or in the car.
Invest in equipping the parents of your church
Most churches will be fortunate to directly impact 1-2% of a child’s life each week. If your church offers programs that engage children for an average of two hours a week over their entire childhood, it amounts to less than 80 days of impact. Parents, on the other hand, are responsible for shepherding over 6,000 days before their kids reach adulthood.
More than the numerical imbalance, the Bible clearly teaches that parents are responsible to bring up their children in “the training and instruction of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4). We also know that loving God with all our heart, soul, mind and strength will overflow in constant conversation about the truth of the gospel with the next generation (Deuteronomy 6:4-9). This cannot happen on Sundays alone!
For example, some churches will choose to apply the model of premarital counseling to offer pre-parenting classes or to use moments like infant baptism as an opportunity to cast vision for the important God-given calling it is to be a parent.
An easy next step
The most strategic (not to mention God-honouring) approach you can take to establish gospel-centred homes in your church is to prayerfully equip the parents. Offer classes, provide resources to help, talk to your church leaders and parents about how you can meaningfully partner to impact the next generation with the truth of the gospel.
My wife Melanie and I are pleased to partner with Youthworks to offer Gospel Centred Parenting, a training seminar for churches to begin to take these steps to advance the gospel among the families of their church
So, how is your church thinking through supporting and equipping families?