The new opportunities for connection during isolation
We have the unique opportunity to foster connections in new ways during this isolated season
In medicine, there is a chance that any given medication may trigger the very thing it was prescribed to cure: anti-anxiety pills may lead to more anxiety, pain relief medication might cause the patient to experience more pain. This is called a paradoxical reaction.
I’ve been thinking about this term a lot lately as I’ve been adjusting to our new (God-willing temporary) normal.
Is it possible that we, too, may experience paradoxical reactions? Could it be that living our lives in isolation may cause us to reach out and be even more connected than when we are free to see one another face to face?
In what follows, I want to think through the opportunities, potential risks, and pose a challenge to anyone reading this about how you can foster paradoxical connections in this isolated season.
Opportunities
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I’ve been on the lookout for glimpses of God’s kindness in these dark days. When I find them, I cling to them as fuel to propel me forward and keep me serving him. A friend suggested one that I hadn’t considered – God’s timing of COVID-19 at such a time in history as this when many of us have easy access to online modes of working and meeting. There are many ways that technology has helped me connect over the last few weeks.
One of my closest friends lives only 10 minutes’ drive away but because of the busyness of life and the difficulties of finding matching openings in the rosters of our two shift-working husbands, it’s really hard to find time to catch up with her and her family. Last week, I FaceTimed her. I’ve never done that before. I got to see her face, hear how she’s going and pray for her in a way that is much better than the quick texts I send off every two or three weeks.
Another opportunity we have for isolated connections are online Bible studies. My group had our first one last Friday night, and one thing we all took away from it was the discipline needed to take turns and not talk over one another (a sin of which I am the chief offender!). Video conferencing makes us listen, makes us take our turns and makes us concentrate on what is being said all the more.
I spoke to another Bible study leader who actually observed that due to social isolation, the number of people in regular Bible study had increased!
These are two opportunities, I’m sure you can think of more.
Potential Risks
While these potential benefits are great, they all rest on the assumption that all those who want connection will seek it out. As someone who has had dark times with depression, I know that when I need connection the most I can instead draw away from people (emotionally self-isolating, as it were). Are there people you know in your networks who are at risk of that?
Another assumption is that all those who want connection will have the means to connect. Sadly, some of our most vulnerable members won’t, they’re not Facebook users, they can’t Facetime, and they don’t even have a computer let alone the ability to Zoom or Skype.
I’ve been so encouraged by how my Dad’s Bible study has been looking after him. He doesn’t have advanced enough tech-skills to Skype in with the group, but members have been calling him regularly to check in and see how he’s going.
My minister gave us a reminder of the old army slogan “no man left behind” and I think in this time, it’s as true as any. Are there members in your networks who have gone quiet? Can you use less technologically-advanced means to reach out to them? A quick phone call to check in?
Challenge
The challenge to us all is to be deliberate in how we connect with each other in this time of isolation. Members of my church were encouraged this week to call one person a day. If we all made one call, what a difference it would make!
There is the potential for a paradoxical growth in connection in this isolated season, but only if we make the most of every opportunity and means that God has given us to leave no man (woman, or child) behind.